90 days of gratitude on the wall...

today i am grateful
humbled
by the stuff dreams are made of

shelter island

time away from troubles

ocean
quiet
salty houses
sweet company

restoration
rest

days of mommies
kids
babies

silly songs

and validation
for the good choices we make
the hard work we do

reminded

that i am not crazy

i gladly return that sobriquet

to the world
which so deserves it
no thank you
i've had enough

beautiful ladies who
tilt their heads
and tip their hats to
another mother's laughter and tears

oh so very grateful

for time away
and for the
shelter of friends

92 days of gratitude on the wall...

GRATITUDE!

yes, those are caps
perhaps the first i have felt
in my bones
since making the 100 day commitment

gratitude that somewhere inside
there is a room

posted over the door:
no sadness
no judgement
no loneliness, bitterness, brick walls
allowed

inside
i'm 17 again
a driver's license
a car-full of girlfriends
my god-given tan

gratitude
that in my 17-year-old's room
blue, blue, electric blue...
there is still space for a sister's smile
(as well as squiring tears)

her soundtrack is different
her friends are different
her life is different

but the first beats of
her song make me
think of mine

must be the good genes, mostly

gratitude

the tribe

i'm looking
although clearly my vision is blurred and inefficient

and listening
although clearly my ears are clogged with too many years of depression
coupled with the imaginary voices heard by the insane

i speak to god
who reminds me
in the soul's midnight hour it is you for whom i wait.